By DiAnn Mills @DiAnnMills

A perfectionist is seldom satisfied with their writing performance, and they are rarely pleased with other’s accomplishments either. Some say it’s the way a person is wired, or how the person was raised, educated, and a host of other reasons. Really? None of us are perfect writers, so friends, we need to get past it.

Too often I view my writing not as an art but as the perfect story. The result could be a book without heart, passion, or human frailty. That’s when I have to take a break and evaluate who I am and why I’ve allowed the demon called perfectionism to threaten my God-given gift.

Our self-worth is not tied up in a perfectionist/performance trap.

For the record, friends, neither is our self-worth wrapped up in book sales. Nor is it based on how many rewrites, edits, writers we mentor, conferences we attend, social media numbers—get the picture? Our self-worth is based on our relationship with God and how we demonstrate His love to others. 

The key is to accept who we are, our strengths and our limitations, and move forward with an attitude of grace. We must move forward perfecting our craft not demanding perfection.

But it’s not easy. Here are 10 ways I’ve found to rid perfectionism and choose acceptance.

1.  Accept I am human and humans are imperfect creatures who must learn to forgive themselves and others. I’m not an exception, but a member of a beautiful collection of people. I do not have to be in control, and I can say no.

2.  Accept I am unique and not to be compared with any other person or writer on the planet. I am loved by God and myself. He has made me unique. I treasure the time spent with Him.

3.  Accept I can finish a project with definite steps and organization, but the project doesn’t define who I am. Everything will get done in due time, and we can plan for it. But if we fail, that’s okay and how we learn.

4.  Accept I can receive constructive criticism and develop strength from my mistakes and failures, not dissolve into a puddle of self-imposed worthlessness.

5.  Accept I can take time for myself to enjoy life and those people special to me. I need time to rejuvenate. We all need to recharge. Get outside and breathe in God’s creation.

6.  Accept I can walk away from a rejection and still be valued and worthy of love. 

7.  Accept I can laugh at myself and the world. Humor is a biblical and scientific salve for all ailments.

8.  Accept realistic goals and remember to dream!

9.  Accept I must take care of myself, physically, mentally, and spiritually.

10. Accept the value of transparency. I can reach out to others when I’m down, need to brainstorm, or simply need to hear another’s voice.

Perfectionism, a nasty trait that too many of us hold onto. Open that trap door and set yourself free!

In the comments below, let us know how you fight the tendency to be perfect?

DiAnn Mills is a bestselling author who believes her readers should expect an adventure. She is a storyteller. Her titles have appeared on the CBA and ECPA bestseller lists; won two Christy Awards; and been finalists for the RITA, Daphne Du Maurier, Inspirational Readers’ Choice, and Carol award contests.

DiAnn is a founding board member of the American Christian Fiction Writers, a member of Advanced Writers and Speakers Association, Mystery Writers of America, Suspense Sister, and International Thriller Writers. She is co-director of The Blue Ridge Mountain Christian Writers Conference and The Mountainside Marketing Conference with social media specialist Edie Melson. She teaches writing workshops around the country. DiAnn is active online and would love to connect with readers on any of the social media platforms listed at www.diannmills.com.

Follow DiAnn on Twitter: @DiAnnMills