by Bethany Jett, @BetJett

There are two major networking opportunities at a writers conference. Sometimes we place a lot of emphasis on the faculty members, but I truly believe it’s crucial to get to know our fellow attendees.

At my first writers conference, I listened as Eva Marie Everson introduced various Keynote speakers, always with a story as to how they met. Most often, they had become friends when they were learning the craft, attending conferences together, and getting their feet wet in this industry.

As I looked around the auditorium, I realized it was the people sitting next to me in the seats that I would “grow up with” as a writer, and maybe one day we’d be on stage together talking about when we first met.

In fact, it is the people I’ve met at conferences that have become my closest confidants and trusted friends. You never know what future bestseller or future agent or publisher sits next to you.

I believe in the power of networking so much that today’s post is dedicated entirely to helping you win.

Tip #1: Body Language Counts

The majority of writers conference attendees are introverts, so if you feel shy, you’re not alone. It’s important to be self-aware, so even if your insides feel like trapped butterflies, pay attention to your posture.

Are your arms folded across your chest? Do you have your face buried in your phone?

Be sure to make eye contact with people and always smile! Relax your shoulders and keep your “frame” open and inviting.

Tip #2: Start the Conversation

Always assume the person sitting next to you is more nervous than you are. If you’re lucky, he or she will start the conversation, but if a few seconds go by, don’t miss the moment.

Introduce yourself and ask “So, what do you write?” That question is seriously the best “icebreaking” secret!

Another tip is to give a compliment to someone. The caveat: this must be genuine or it will ring false. The second caveat: be careful complimenting the opposite sex. There, I said it. However, if someone has an awesome one sheet or you love their shoes, feel free to say so!

The two-sentence conversation that sparked an amazing friendship between Michelle Medlock Adams and me was when she flew past me in the hall and I said, “Oh–I love your belt!” She turned, smiled, and said, “Thank you!” Bing. Bang. Boom.

Tip #3: Find Common Ground

It’s easy to find commonality at a writers conference because our main career, hobby, or passion is writing. However, ask questions so you can go beyond just “I’m a writer.”

What genre does the other person write? Do they have family? Kids? Where do they live? How did they get started in the writing industry?  Either you’ll connect on some mutual passion or hobby, or you may know someone who does. In that case, be sure to introduce and connect them!

Robert Benson once said, “Being listened to feels a lot like being loved.” An observation about writers: we’re often “in our heads” for much of the time, so by focusing on the other person, we allow them to share their thoughts out loud. We can love each other by listening.

Tip #4: Hand out Business Cards

In Week 2 of our countdown posts we discussed in detail the power of business cards. Handing someone your card is also an ice breaker. It gives them something to look at, and nine times out of ten, they’ll hand you one of theirs.

We suggest having white space on the back of the card so people can write notes. This is really important because you’re going to meet so many people at the conference that by the end of the week, everyone’s names and faces have blurred together.

Tip #5: Follow Up

Depending on who you met, you can follow up by connecting on social media, sending a thank you email, or submitting a requested proposal or manuscript. If you make a new friend, ask if you can connect via Facebook or Twitter. It’s important to surround yourself with people who really “get” you and understand the writers’ life.

When I would call my husband during my first conference, I was speaking in our “writer terminology.” While he gave supportive “way to go’s!” it wasn’t until I got on the phone with my mom (novelist extraordinaire!) that I found someone who knew exactly what I meant by proposals and one sheets, and understood the pre-pitching session jitters.

We love the networking that is already taking place within our Facebook group. If you haven’t joined us there yet, click here so we can add you to the fun! It’s way better to make connections before you arrive, but whether you’re in the Facebook group or not, we cannot wait to meet you, greet you, hug and handshake you!

[reminder]Do you have a networking tip to share? [/reminder]

Bethany Jett is a military wife and homeschool boy-mom who is addicted to suspense novels and all things girly. She is an award-winning author, speaker, ghostwriter, and founder of JETTsetter Ink. In her spare time, Bethany is working on her Masters degree in Marketing: New Media and Communication.

Bethany writes on being the CEO of your life at BethanyJett.com. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter.